Are You Confused About Your Relationship With Food?
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Are You Confused About Your Relationship With Food?
Are You Confused About Your Relationship With Food? In my last newsletter I discussed how to maintain an ideal body weight. In this latest newsletter I shall discuss where our eating habits come from and how hypnosis and neuro-linguistic programming can help you to lose and maintain a healthy body weight.
Oftentimes our eating habits are established as children. Children are susceptible to imprinting from authority figures such as parents and teachers and whatever has been imprinted can remain programmed in the subconscious mind all our lives unless they are changed (or reprogrammed) through hypnosis. I know as a child growing up in the UK I was told to “eat it all up” as there are many people starving in the world!
We are offered food for comfort from birth, whether it is breast or bottle and this is often perpetuated by parents and caregivers who will give a child food such as sweet and biscuits when they are hurt or upset.
We also get into the habit of eating certain types of food be it from our culture or simply following the good or bad habits of our parents.
Some people simply overeat; It usually fills a need – sometimes to compensate for an unpleasant experience, lack of love and intimacy, or to suppress grief, anger, anxieties or other emotions such as fear, frustration or boredom and even to avoid sex. People who have been sexually abused as children sometimes (not all the time) will subconsciously make themselves unattractive to avoid sexual attention . Others overeat simply to reward themselves, to entertain themselves or even to be noticed.
Hypnosis can be very effective in helping you to lose and maintain a healthy body weight . It does not, however, work miracles. It is not a magic bullet that immediately makes you love exercise. It is a deep state of relaxation and intense mental focus that can help you re-programme old attitudes and beliefs about eating.
Some of these messages seem pretty simple, and they are. It’s just where they reside that makes the difference. Suggestions such as “you eat only in response to your body’s natural need for food as fuel” or “you’ll feel completely satisfied with three small nutritious meals a day” or “your enjoyment of a regular exercise programme grows with each time you visit the gym”. Repetition of these suggestions can boost your determination and enhance your conscious willpower, when you have such a desire.
Mental imagery is another important part of hypnosis. Whilst in a hypnotic state, I will lead you through an imaginary journey seeing yourself in clothes that you have grown out of. You might imagine the positive comments of friends or co-workers. You might be encouraged to use all five senses to experience yourself growing thinner, stronger and healthier. Studies show that the more real your inner experience, the more likely the final results will match your mental imagery. Imagination is the language of the subconscious mind; Your brain does not know the difference between what is real and not real; Every thought that you have changes your physiology and in imagining that which you want you are reprogramming your mind, creating new neural pathways (or thought patterns).
Self-hypnosis is another powerful tool to re-enforce suggestions and imagery. I give out many different cds for my clients to listen to at home and they are supported when I am not with them.
Regression techniques are valuable in helping you understand why you eat when you are not hungry and you can begin to change that behaviour. Another benefit of regression is to identify and understand beliefs and feelings about food and body image which you may not be aware of consciously. One negative belief a person can have is “everyone in my family is fat, it is in my genes, therefore I cannot change”. This is a negative belief that has a secondary gain which means you don’t have to “try to lose weight”.
But, and it is a big but, hypnosis alone is not enough. It takes a combination of behavioural modification and understanding to achieve a permanent healthy eating pattern. The trick is to eat enough of the right foods so you are not hungry. Food is not the enemy – hunger is the enemy! When we are hungry we want something instantly and we grab the first available food which is quick and easy such as starches and junk foods. If you plan and prepare and eat small amounts of healthy foods throughout the day to keep hunger at bay you can then make healthy sensible choices. It is not necessary to cut out chocolate entirely – just eat a whole lot less of them! Increased energy levels will motivate you to exercise which in turn increases those feel-good hormones. In this way you are developing new habits for life. The loss may be slow but it will be a healthy loss without deprivation. Remember! Most of us do not put that excess weight on overnight so it is wise not to expect to lose it overnight! When we are in a hurry to lose the weight and our focus is on “loss” then we spiral into that “on a diet” “off a diet” way of thinking. You don’t have to diet; you just need to change your diet!
It takes just as much effort to remain in a body you say you don’t want or to alter your thinking process to one of a new thin, slim, trim body. The subconscious mind does not care what is implanted into it’s fertile soil and will act out accordingly with just as much effort. The agenda is to change the thought processes, both consciously and subconsciously. Uniting both minds on the same wavelength for positive results.
The first step is to make that decision to change your relationship with food. The second step is to book an appointment with me today so that I can help you get where you want to be! E-mail me at [email protected] or ‘phone 082 929 5142 to book your first session.
I hope you have a blessed Christmas and New Year and if you are travelling you have a safe journey.
Healing Anger, Aggression and Jealousy
Healing Anger, Aggression and Jealousy
Healing Anger, Aggression and Jealousy. David came to see me because he was suffering extreme anger, aggression and jealousy towards his partner of 2 years. This behaviour was totally out of character and was jeopardizing his relationship with not only his partner, but also her family.
David is 50 years of age and the only child of a woman who is judgmental and critical. She did not want a son and never hid this fact from him. She suffered from depression and tried, on several occasions, to commit suicide. As a young boy David came home from school on a number of occasions to find that she had tried to commit suicide.
David’s parents did not have a happy marriage. David has a conscious memory of his Mother walking out – he was a little boy watching his Mother walk out the driveway as he pleaded with her to stay.
The Sessions
I conducted a Word Association Test on David whilst he was in hypnosis. The results revealed that he had a tremendous fear of losing someone he loves.
Regression to the times when his Mother left home, her attempted suicide and feelings of rejection because he was not a girl did not elicit any emotion. I realized that those events were not the Initial Sensitizing Event (the event that is driving his negative behaviour today). An ISE is usually accompanied by a great deal of emotion.
Further regression uncovered the Initial Sensitizing Event. At age 4 years David was playing in the street outside his home when his dog ran out into the road. The dog was hit by a car and was lying in the road in great pain. The driver initially got out of her car, but then abandoned him. The dog eventually died. He knew he was going to be in trouble with his Mother. David managed to get the dog into the garden and he initially hid it behind a bush. David was not only very upset about the death of his dog, but felt guilty because he believed it was his fault that the dog had got out of the garden.
“I feel different: happy, light hearted, positive & free! My aggression/ anger/ insecurity has been beaten, & I’m able to deal with adverse situations in a rational manner. The change in me has brought us all closer than we could ever have hoped for.”
David, November 2007
David was able to re-play the event and could see that the dog actually got out through a hole in the fence. The 4 year old David was then able to understand that it was not his fault – his Father was responsible for the repair of the fence. Whilst in hypnosis David was able to see himself as a 4 year old sitting alone and scared of what would happen when his Mother found the dog. His Mother discovered him like this and berated him on the death of his dog.
A lot of emotion was released as David re-lived this event. He is a 50 year old man who had believed all these years that it was his fault that his dog had died.
Further regression revealed that David had lived in a past life where he lost the woman he loved due to not keeping in touch with her. There were many regrets. The love that he lost in this past life was his partner in his current life. Meeting her was the symptom producing event – it brought back the memories of loss – of her in the past life and of his dog.
David is now calm and all his initial negative feelings have disappeared.
NOTES:
Sometimes your feelings of loss are hidden. Somehow you get through everyday without despairing over past experiences. And then suddenly something happens to cause behaviour that is out of character. Meeting his partner was that something, that exposed the fact that David had never recovered from his experiences. By having the courage to confront his past, understand what happened and forgive, David has been set free to be happy.
- Read more about your subconscious mind and How Hypnosis Works; or
- Contact Linda, make an appointment and start changing your life today!
Healing Phobias with Hypnotherapy
Healing Phobias with Hypnotherapy
Healing Phobias with Hypnotherapy. Mary had a fear of doctors, treatments and the medical environment generally. At the time she came to see me she was pregnant and wanted to resolve this problem prior to the birth. She was due to have a C-section and would faint at the mere mention of blood. She was afraid that she would panic during the birth and have an anxiety attack.
Mary’s Mother suffered chronic depression for 10 years and much of her childhood was spent “being good” so as not to upset her mother.
The Sessions
A Word Association Test conducted whilst under hypnosis revealed that there were a lot of fear, anger and resentment issues from childhood, relating to her Mother’s depression. Mary associates hospitals and doctors with sadness and loneliness.
“My experience was definitely positive. After 2 sessions, my hospital stay was not that bad. Even now I can go to the doctor without those feelings of nervousness.”
Mary, March 2008
Hypnotic regression took Mary to a time when she cut her foot at age 5. Her Father dealt with the blood as Mother didn’t like the sight of the blood and kept away.
Further regression revealed that Mary felt responsible for her Mother’s unhappiness and often felt guilty. She took on her Mother’s unhappiness. The younger Mary – whilst in hypnosis – had to understand that the unhappiness did not belong to her. It belonged to her Mother.
Mary also came to understand that she was modeling her Mother’s behaviour with her fear of blood. This fear also did not belong to her.
Mary was able to visualize the future when she was preparing for her C-section to have her baby. She was able to visualize herself being calm and excited about seeing her baby for the first time. She was able to anchor those calm feelings.
I recorded a cd for Mary to listen to at home to re-programme her mind. This cd contained suggestions that blood and medical procedures are not negative. Blood sustains life. Placenta is full of blood and is keeping her unborn baby alive.
Mary reported that she was able to enjoy the birth of her baby in a calm and relaxed manner.
NOTES:
Mary’s phobia was due to unresolved thought-emotions that she needed to uncover and understand. If Mary had not taken this step she would have fallen into a cycle of stress, anxiety and depression which would have left her in despair.
- Read more about How Hypnotherapy helps with Anxiety, Stress and Depression ; more about Phobias or
- Contact Linda, make an appointment and start changing your life today!
How to Maintain an Ideal Body Weight
How to Maintain an Ideal Body Weight –
How To Maintain an Ideal Body Weight. Maintaining an ideal weight is a constant battle for many people. Often the outcome of this battle is a perpetual weight gain/weight loss seesaw. Women frequently have a bigger problem than men because they tend to have more body fat. Despite the millions of rands spent annually on weight loss clubs, diet books, diet pills, liquid diets and fancy spas still more and more people are struggling to control their weight. It seems that the more people struggle with weight loss diets, the more their weight seems to inch its way back up. The result is often weight gain to a level that exceeds the previous high weight.
Moreover, the emotional impact of being overweight and the weight loss/weight gain seesaw is devastating. We are conditioned, mostly through the media, to equate self-esteem with personal appearance. Thus, people with weight problems often experience severe swings in self-esteem that relate directly to their current weight and it’s comparison to the current “fashionable” body type. Additionally an otherwise competent person may feel “weak” or a “failure” because they are unable to control their weight and negative feelings and beliefs cause them to give up and resort to sugary high fat foods in order to feel better.
Research abounds with legitimate, but inconclusive theories about why people are overweight. Some theories suggest that a low level of “brown fat” in some people causes fewer calories to be burned after a meal. These people are more likely to gain weight. Other studies show that people who are prone to overweight have more than the ordinary amount of fat cells at birth or develop them during periods of overeating. Thus, there may even be a genetic basis for obesity.
Another idea is the “set point” theory”, which concludes that each individual has a predetermined “set point” where their weight naturally gravitates (where caloric intake is balanced by caloric output). For some the set point is low: We all know that lucky someone who can eat and eat and never gain weight. For others it is high: Some of us seem to gain weight at the mere sight of a cream puff! The jury is still out, but evidence points to regular vigorous exercise as one way to lower a person’s “set point”. However, current research is contradictory.
What’s the answer then to this mystery of weight control that eludes some many wonderful, competent people? There is no single solution for all people. While self-control is involved in weight control, obesity does not seem to be simply a question of willpower. Therefore, this article is designed to help you figure out what might work best for you and to provide some ideas that may help you to stop torturing yourself with a weight struggle.
Give yourself a break from dieting! Most popular diets (that is, those that are not medically prescribed for specific medical problems) are rigid and unnatural. People become easily bored with them and begin to resent them. For this reason such diets are rarely maintained over a long period of time. People feel the compulsion to “cheat” and consequently feel guilty. They generally wind up going back to whatever eating pattern they had before – often with a vengeance.
Research has found that people who are able to get off the diet cycle can settle into more normal, non-bingeing eating patterns. This alone may produce at least some weight loss. It may be hard to lose the reins on dieting, but it appears that people who eat what they desire and listen to their bodies generally lose their obsession for foods and maintain a reasonable weight.
Taking a break from dieting can help you gain perspective on your problem. Try to discover what it’s like to eat sensibly. You deserve to eat what you like just like anyone. In fact, feeling that you don’t deserve to eat what satisfies you may encourage irrational eating. Once you get into a pattern of paying attention to eating normally – according to your body’s signals of what it needs – food will lose its power over you. Listening to your body can make its needs become clear.
If you’re like most people who are heavier than they want to be you are constantly in a state of either dieting or eating too much and feeling guilty and unhappy. Either way, this feeds a vicious cycle of self-deprivation and over-compensation. That’s not how a normal person eats! Overweight people are further pressured with worries about health risks associated with excess weight. While these concerns may be legitimate, the pressures they create only add to anxiety, which helps keep the vicious cycle going.
Eating less is not the answer. Most people think that the less someone eats the more fat they will lose. This is not necessarily true. Although your intake of calories and corresponding level of activity (burning calories) have an effect on weight they are only part of the equation. Just as important is how and what you eat and how you exercise. The best way to lose weight is with a healthy eating plan of nutritious foods (often with more but smaller meals, eaten throughout the day). Often 6 small meals will facilitate weight loss better than one or two larger meals.
What happens when you eat too little in an attempt to lose weight? The human body expects and/or needs a certain volume of food in order to complete the tasks and functions that you demand from it. This obviously varies with a person’s level of activity and overall physical condition. When your body does not receive an adequate supply of fuel it presumes itself to be starving. As a natural survival response your body essentially says “I am not getting enough fuel so I will need to slow the consumption of the fuel”. It does so by slowing the metabolic rate. When this happens there are residual effects. As the metabolic rate slows, calories are consumed at a slower rate making it even more difficult to lose weight. Even more importantly in an attempt to hoard the fuel your body will hold on to, and even bloat fat cells in anticipation of starvation. Your body will then begin to break down muscle tissue as its alternative source of fuel. As your metabolic rate drops a loss of energy is experienced making it even more difficult for you to find the motivation to exercise. This increases the downward spiral taking you further from your goal for weight loss. Since muscle weighs more than fat you may lose some weight by eating less, weight loss is more likely to be the muscle that you wanted to keep rather than the fat you wanted to lose.
Muscle consumes calories every moment of the day in an attempt to maintain itself. The more muscle mass the quicker you can lose weight and the more energetic you feel. For healthy weight loss it is important to not only maintain but also increase muscle mass and density.
Start listening to your body. Allow yourself to eat what you wish. Slow down and focus on the enjoyment that food brings you. Give all your attention to your food (no tv, computer, book etc.) Many people eat so fast that they barely remember eating, much less enjoying their food. RELAX! A good way to help you slow down your eating is to put your fork or food down between bites. Above all, pay attention to your body’s cues that tell you when you are satisfied. STOP THERE. You can always have more later if you really want to. Overeating, as we all know, is an uncomfortable feeling.
Work on loving and gratifying yourself at any weight. You may have said to yourself, “I’ll get pretty clothes when I get thin,” or “I know when I’m thinner I’ll go out more and meet more women/men!” DON’T WAIT!!! Do good things for yourself now. So what if you have to buy those slacks two sizes bigger than you want to? Sizes are only numbers to help you find clothes that fit your body – not statements about whether or not you are attractive, worthy, or good. Besides, looking like a second-hand store reject will only make you feel worse. There are many so-called “heavy” people who look great. They buy smart clothes that fit them well and wear their hair fashionably. People come in all shapes and sizes. Believe it or not, not everyone is attracted to the muscle image or the fashion model body. You are short-changing yourself if you resist meeting people because you don’t think anyone will be attracted to you. It’s a risk to get out there and meet new people, whether you’re married or single, but it’s a risk that all people have to take, regardless of their size.
Understand that our society’s image of beauty is narrow and unrealistic. We all come in different shapes and sizes, and it’s ridiculous to think that the fashion magazine image is the only indicator of true beauty. Very few people become models – and this year’s look will be next year’s castaway. In many parts of the world, fleshy, voluptuous bodies are given high status. Look for the beauty in everyone you meet – including yourself – and work hard to focus on that.
Focus on your personal power and learn to trust yourself. Weight loss clubs and diet pills may help some people, but when you seek help from an outside source, you give up some of your power to help yourself in the way that uniquely suits you. It becomes hard to listen to what your body tells you if you eat what other people tell you to, take a drug that alters your body’s messages, or adopt an attitude that may not be your own belief because you’ll do anything to lose weight. The more you realize that you can truly control your own life in most regards, the closer you’ll be to finding an eating pattern that is right for you – despite the double messages from society that create so much pressure for us all.
Losing weight and keeping it off is not easy, but it’s not impossible. Put your efforts where they will do the most good. Work hard to love yourself, to respect yourself, and, above all, to trust yourself. And learn to enjoy eating and the positive results that enjoyment produces.
In my next newsletter I’ll discuss where our eating habits come from and how hypnosis can help you change your behaviour and perceptions.
Until next time……………
Hypnosis and NLP for Anxiety, Stress and Depression
Hypnosis and NLP for Anxiety, Stress and Depression. Anxiety is a normal reaction to Stress. But when anxiety becomes an excessive, irrational dread of everyday situations you need to do something about it before it is not only a burden you have to struggle with every day, but it also makes you physically ill and depressed.
Is your stress impacting on your progress at work?
Are you crippled with exam nerves?
Are you paralyzed with fear at the prospect of speaking in public?
Are you so shy that you avoid interacting with others?
If you have answered yes to any of the above questions then your mind and body are telling you that there are unresolved thought-emotions that you need to uncover and understand. If you don’t you will fall into a cycle of stress, anxiety and depression which may leave you in despair.
Deal with your unresolved thought-emotions and live your life to the fullest! Jump at this opportunity now and contact Linda Clarke for more information on using Hypnosis and NLP for Anxiety, Stress and Depression.
What is Mind-Body Balance?
Hypnotherapy and NLP works on the principle that your mind and body work together to create a healthy physical and mental balance. Psychological or physical ill health occurs when the harmonious balance of mind and body is upset.
How you THINK and what you FEEL influences your PHYSICAL HEALTH
A PHYSICAL SYMPTOM when extended over a period of time will change how you THINK AND FEEL.
If a symptom (eg anxiety) continues to linger after it’s usefulness has ended, this is a sign that the mind and body are no longer working together in harmonious balance. Understand the cause of your anxiety, learn techniques to choose your emotional state and put those anxiety attacks behind you forever. Take that step and Contact Linda Clarke today.
Read more about how feelings and emotions impact your health.
Approaches to Alleviating Anxiety
Hypnosis can uncover the underlying causes for anxiety:-
- What is triggering an anxiety attack?
- Why is that trigger causing this reaction?
NLP offers us many techniques to access and anchor desired states. This means that you can choose your emotional state!
The way our minds work is that the physical reaction – in this case anxiety – happens when old memories, emotions and feelings come to the surface. You may have no conscious knowledge of these feelings and beliefs. Hypnosis uncovers these memories, allowing you to understand and accept them. NLP affords us many techniques to access and anchor desired states. In so doing you restore the mind-body balance required to live a healthy, fulfilled and happy life.
Contact Linda Clarke and explore using hypnosis and NLP for anxiety. Also have a look at Linda’s Holistic Massage which is very effective in alleviating feelings of anxiety and Mindfulness meditation.